What to Do When My Ex Texts Me Out Of The Blue

It doesn’t matter how long have you broken up with your ex-partner, their call can never be too expected. Moreover, these people always come back for some reason. Whether you are ready or not, your ex might still have the attachment or audacity to show themselves in your mailbox. But how do you keep face and not do something you would regret later?

Together with BebeMur, we found a perfect solution.

1. Don’t panic  and stay critical

If you’re already opening their message, you lost this battle instantly. And yes, it is a battle with your sanity and dignity because in most cases, you low-key expect a heartfelt text with apologies and confessions in love. But remember that exes are sly foxes. You might be endlessly flattered with their “defeat,” while all they want to do is find a quick sex partner since you are their most accessible option. Before making yourself a fool, listen to what they have to say.

2. Don’t answer them immediately

Not only does this give off desperate vibes, but you will also help them understand you have been long awaiting their text. Don’t give your ex this leverage and instead, check the notification bar and put your phone away. If all they say is “hello,” chances are, they can wait.

3. Text your group chat

If you are way too tempted to answer them immediately, text your close circle and listen to what they have to say. Chances are, they have seen all the toxicity in your connection and can see the situation from the side. If your family recommends you block them or at least not answer them immediately, listen to their advice because getting back with your ex after one drunk text never did anyone justice.

4. Think over your strategy

You might be overflooded with emotions and ready to pour your heart out, but don’t rush to do it just yet. You have to be cold-hearted and calculated when answering your ex.

5. Show no emotion

Showing emotion and confessing how hard it is to live without them would be a disaster. Sure, people can break up as friends and normally share their emotional agenda but suppose you are surprised to receive their text, you are not friends now. And if you are checking this guide, you might be confused and paralyzed by their text. In this case, you showcase every symptom of emotional attachment. Your ex-partner doesn’t have to know about that. 

6. Have no mercy and preserve your borders

If your ex-partner instantly starts complaining about the lack of you in their life, don’t be too flattered to fall into this trap. In other cases, they might trigger your loneliness, feeling of guilt, manipulate you, or be verbally aggressive. Remember that you do not own this person anything, therefore you can always block them or abstain from engaging in online fights mentally.

7. Remember why you broke up in the first place

Getting back with your ex is not always bad if you broke up after a series of miscommunications and pride. But if your partner was incompatible or showed signs of emotional or physical abuse, entertaining this connection will lead you nowhere. Let the past be past.

8. Don’t ask for closure

People who ask for closure are hiding the fact that they want to deserve a second chance. There is no closure after you break up. Whatever unspoken complaints are left between you are a result of your projection. Let it go and don’t talk about feelings first.

9. If you plan to meet again, take things slowly

There is no need to rush if you plan on continuing talking to your ex. If you want to be fair and square, don’t take an extra step being the one who invites the other party for a walk. All in all, they reached you, not vice versa.